incoherent?

azi dimineata m-am trezit si m-am uitat nedumerita in jurul meu. nu stiam ce se intampla. am inchis ochii si i-am tinut strans inchisi si cand i-am deschis din nou, peretele alb a aparut din nou in fata mea. in buimaceala mea nu intelegeam de ce era alb si nu roz. m-am uitat pe geam si nu am mai vazut casa galbena de vis-a-vis, in schimb am vazut-o pe cea caramizie.

ma gandeam ca probabil inca visez si ca ar fi cazul sa ma trezesc. am auzit niste pasi in camera. credeam ca e luni dimineata si ca am intarziat la scoala si ca vine mama sa ma trezeasca. in loc sa fie vocea lu mama, era vocea lui mary, care insista sa ma trezeasca. cand am auzit-o m-am trezit de tot si mi-am dat seama ca nu sunt acasa-la mine, in patul-meu, sau in fata geamului-meu. mi-am dat seama ca nimic din ceea ce ma inconjoara nu e al meu si nu inca imi e strain.

totul e inca nou, schimbarea nu e inca realizabila. cum se poate numi faptul ca in fiecare dimineata cand ma trezesc imi ia cateva secunde sa imi dau seama ce se intampla. am alta viata. am alta camera, alt pat, alta fereastra. sunt o alta eu? nu m-am schimbat aproape deloc, decat daca consideram ca acum merg cu bicicleta la scoala, ca uneori merg pe munte, si ca sunt in alta lume. in schimb, sunt aceasi eu narcisista, obsedata de blondul meu inca imperfect, aceasi eu sensibila si superficiala.

am ramas la fel doar ca am adaugat dorului pe care il simt pentru voi, alte cateva trasaturi de personalitate.

fiction?! or maybe not?!

...after the good chance finally got us together, we had to be careful not to let anything interfere between us. he was a really good company. we never got bored of each other. sometimes we used to stay on a bench in the park and just look at the sky. nothing seemed boring when we were together. not even being in line at the supermarket.

we completed each other. i know is sounds like a chiche, but this is how it was. he always used to outline the best in me. he tried to make my weaknesses less visible. he always used to like my obsession for perfection, and my passion for new things. with his help i had the strength to change and become a better person, more loyal, caring, more able to listen to other peoples problems.

just like we met all of a sudden, this is how we were separated. it was not so hard to accept it because he always taught me to always see the good in situations, and that is what i did.

i don't think i could ever thank him for all the happiness i felt with him, and i could never be grateful enough for seeing and outlining the best in me.

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